3 The Hard Way...

Yes, please.

2012-02-17T09:19:00.000-08:00

Has anyone seen Gillette's Masters of Style commercial? It literally stopped me in my tracks.

I was like, holy shit, I need to buy my man this razor.

It was like that for me. Whoever came up with this campaign has the marketing key to my heart.

Turns out he already uses it. Which is great, because I would have shown up on Valentine's Day with just a razor and a confused look on my face as to why I bought it.

in search of a rainbow...or at least some sanity.

2012-02-15T04:52:00.000-08:00

A place called Roxy in Scottsdale has this hanging on one of its walls:

first 3 words I spotted: funny, broken, fool. Nonsense!

true

Yesterday I got a new (temporary) 6 week assignment at work. And that’s about all the time I need to get back to that old normal feeling of satisfaction I usually have. The next 6 weeks Ill be forced to sleep normal hours, learn new things in a different environment, meet new people, and stay busy with interesting work. I’m good. Actually I’m great. I feel so blessed.

And I have this new obsession with big cats. I hate them, they scare me to death.

I found this picture of Oscar somewhere online and can't.stop.laughing...

"Without just one nest

A bird can call the world home

Life is your career"

- Chuck Palahniuk

Lindsey Pavao, The Voice.

.gotye.

2012-02-13T19:49:00.000-08:00

"You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness...now you're just somebody that I used to know."

I feel like this song tells the story of so many relationships, for so many people, everywhere. It's so beautiful when a song can do that...even if it is about a depressing ass subject. ;)

.whitney.

2012-02-11T20:11:00.000-08:00

We danced and sang along to your tapes at my 8th birthday.

In college, me and my best friend spent an entire afternoon singing your greatest hits at the top of our lungs and laughed until we cried.

Your voice is the soundtrack to so many memories of joy for me.

Thank you.

Hope you are singing with the angels.

Update

2012-02-09T11:05:00.001-08:00

I jogged yesterday...

...with my boyfriend.

I don't think you can fully appreciate how unique a statement that is coming from me.

First of all, the last time I jogged was in 8th Grade gym class. After one lap, I veered off the track and collapsed in front of the goal post. Ever since then, I can barely even bring myself to walk briskly.

Second of all, I have a boyfriend.

More importantly, a boyfriend I wanna go JOGGING with.

It doesn't stop there. Being with him has totally motivated me to get my wifey game up (and by up, I mean up from being...non-existent). I'm over here looking up recipes, cleaning like a madwoman, trying to fix my credit, devoting hours on end to my chemistry homework, and doing kegel exercises like a muthaf*cka.

I just feel like I want to maximize my awesome-ness, ya know?

That's what happens when you meet someone you're proud of. Someone that you absolutely adore.

I've become the girl that talks incessently about how good her man is, how well he treats her, and how she wants to do the same. I'm surprised my friends haven't tried to stab me.

But they love it.

And fuck it. So do I.

.socks.

2012-02-08T22:52:00.000-08:00

He wakes up before me, kisses the back of my head softly and enters the shower. I always liked the way he did that, not waking me since it's not necessary. Fine with letting me sleep a bit longer.

He puts First Take on in the living room and Skips voice fills the room.

I know that means it's time for me to get up and start getting ready. I wonder how long it had taken for our rituals to form. How long does it take for things to become unspoken between two people? I guess every pair is different. Some rituals begin without words.

While getting ready I realize I've forgotten socks and ask him for a pair. He looks in his drawer and hands me a small pair.

"Here, these are yours."

I glance at them. They're not mine but I take them anyway. My feet are cold and when I am cold details don't matter but...I can't hold it.

"These aren't mine."

"They have to be, who else's would they be?"

I shrug and walk into the living room and pull my shoes on. "I don't know, but...they're not mine. I don't have socks like these."

He eyes me carefully and proceeds to insist that they must be mine, no other woman spends the night in his home, so they must be, there is no other explanation, Whose could they be? Huh? Whose? He looks pained like with his words he is preparing himself for battle.

We are now on opposite sides of the room, facing each other. Things get thick in the air like they do when you walk through a dangerous neighborhood. This is the place where regrets are formed. These are the moments before scars are born, but I don't feel it. Not anymore.

"Maybe they're your Moms", I say quietly. He immediately softens and the air gets light.

"Yeah, maybe...from when they came to visit. I...they must be."

"Well then, they're hers."

I gather up my things and he gets in front of me. "You believe me that they couldn't belong to anyone else right? I need to know that you believe me."

I look at his face and I believe him.

And in that moment I realize that we had made it. It took longer than we could have anticipated, so many hard conversations, several separations, testing other waters but we made it.

Real trust is a hard place to get to but we made it. And he has told me so many times that he loves me and I've always said it back but I know real Love is akin to real Trust so if we were to have a Love story it would begin that day.

All the days before would simply be our prologue.

A beginning and an end. A prelude to the true.

.frank.

2012-02-06T22:42:00.000-08:00

I love Frank Ocean.

I love that he is such an incredibly talented writer.

Love everything about his musical style.

.now playing.

2012-01-29T11:34:00.000-08:00

Purity Ring- Lofticries

Purity Ring - Lofticries from David Dean Burkhart on Vimeo.

Doldrums-Endless Winter

.breakfast.

2012-01-29T11:14:00.000-08:00

The only thing I know how to make for breakfast is Love.

Only thing I know how to do is let the light shine through this quiet room,

keep you warm against this cold world and hold you down when shit gets tough.

The only thing I know how to make for breakfast is Love.

You just let me know if that's enough.

©Elle Be 2012

.image lifted from tumblr.

happy friday!

2012-01-27T11:06:00.000-08:00

Salma

and Salma

Isa Leshko

2012-01-24T03:24:00.000-08:00

I read this article on the nytimes website and fell in love. On photographing elderly animals, artist Isa Leshko says:

"I am creating these photographs to gain a deeper understanding about what it means to be mortal and to exorcise my fears of aging. I have come to realize that these images are self-portraits, or at the very least, they are manifestations of my fears and hopes about what I will be like when I am old. My intention is to take an honest and unflinching look at old age and I want these images to inspire others to become aware of and to engage with their own attitudes toward aging and mortality. I also want my images to inspire greater empathy toward animals, particularly farm animals. It is rare to see a farm animal that has actually lived its natural life span given that most of these animals experience brutality and death early in their lives."

handsome one, age 33
finn sheep, age 12

teresa, age 13

Elderly Animals - Isa Leshko

.the truth.

2012-01-23T18:01:00.000-08:00

I'm so desensitized that this didn't even sting, but it would have one year ago.

Oh, how it would have one year ago.

READ HERE by metroadlib

.if you.

2012-01-21T17:27:00.000-08:00

If you sleep on it, someone else will sneak up on it.

If you sleepin on it, someone else already wants it.

If you sleep on it, you gonna wake up nightmare wishin' for your dreams.

Know what I mean?

©Elle Be 2012

.shit single girls say.

2012-01-20T16:28:00.001-08:00

So I know these are played out but....

lately...

2012-01-18T02:10:00.000-08:00

(las vegas)

A Male Perspective: 3 Signs That You Are Settling & 3 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t.

2012-01-12T17:41:00.000-08:00

The virus must finally have gone airborne. At first there were only isolated cases, but at some point this thing must have become incredibly contagious. Now, at the graceful age of thirty, I see it everywhere I look. Women like you, settling for men that you wouldn’t have looked at twice only 5 years ago.

Of course, you don’t call it settling. No one wants to call it settling. Instead you say that you are “finally focusing on what’s really important”. Except that’s a lie. You knew what was important by the time you turned 13. Probably before then. It’s hardwired into your DNA.

That’s right, I said it. The same qualities that your non bikini-line-waxing prehistoric ancestors were instinctively drawn to, are the exact same ones you should still be looking for today. Why, you ask? Well, why not? What makes you think you are smarter than 200,000 years of evolution? Still not convinced? Just keep reading…

3 Signs that you are pulling a Christina Aguilera(Settling):

1)When asked to describe him, the first thing you talk about is how “nice” he is.

Don’t get me wrong, nice is great. I guess. But I consider “nice” to be a periphery quality. Window dressing. That is, it’s a quality that’s great when attached to a core quality. Examples of core qualities include: a) Being funny (indicates a quick wit, awareness of surroundings, an ability to perceive subtle correlations, social prowess, ect -> all of which are good, old fashioned caveman talents), b) Strength (What...? You’re telling me you don’t want to feel protected? Be serious. Men should be strong… physically and or mentally. It’s still a Sabertooth tiger-eat-man world out there.

Then there are periphery qualities like being “nice”. You see, nice can certainly come from a place of strength and kindness. But it can also mean weakness or an inability to stand up for himself and/or others. It can mean apathy. It can mean that he’s just humoring you. You get my point. Before you decide whether “nice” is a good thing, see what else it’s attached to.

2)Other men blatantly hit on you in front of your man.

They don’t respect him. Because you don’t respect him. Yes, it is in fact obvious.

3)You are always going on and on to your friends about “how happy you are”.

The only person you are trying to convince is, yourself. Women who are in happy relationships don’t have time for all that talking, because they are way too busy ~~fucking~~ being happy.

3 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Settle For Lame

1)There are still no guarantees.

We all felt Elin and Vanessa’s pain, and I totally get it. No one wants to get cheated on, much less publicly humiliated. However, while it may be more likely that a man with the star-power of Tiger Woods will putt for other holes (sorry), Joe the Plumber could just as easily do the same. Personally, I say roll the dice and go big. Arguably, it’s a better gamble. After all, can you really afford to risk getting cheated on by the senior associate at Foot Locker? Just imagine the embarrassment.

2)Things will get worse, not better.

You know when you SHOULD settle? In about 30 years. Settle then. Settle for the guy who you couldn’t keep your hands off at age 30, the guy who rocked your universe for the next decade.

Because that’s exactly what you will have to do after 30 years of marriage. Settle. Because 30 years is a LONG COT DAMN TIME. You better find someone you have a crazy, insanely passionate love/lust for. You are gonna have to be infatuated with him now, to even have a remote chance of being able to tolerate him in 2042. If you are just lukewarm to happy now, where does that go in even 5 years? 10? 50? Settle and you are signing up for a life of having to numb your soul’s anguish with prescription medications and wine coolers.

3)Your very own Dwayne Wade could be just around the next corner.

Look, I know your eggs have a little countdown going on in your subconscious version of ESPN’s sports-ticker. I can’t imagine what that feels like. But show a little faith, a little optimism, a little courage. Come on, aren’t women supposed to be the hopeless romantics? How does that “Don’t settle for the one you can live with, wait for the one you can’t live without” quote go?

What if you meet David Beckham (for the purpose of my parable, lets pretend that he a) is straight, and b) falls madly in love with you) a month after you married Jon Gosselin? Sure, you could probably suck it up and remain faithful to your commitment. But would you really want to do that… forever? For EVER ever?

I don’t have all the answers. I know a lot of guys (particularly those who have a lot of things going on in their lives) just don’t want to settle down right now. After all, what’s the rush? You would want to wait too if it wasn’t for that whole making babies thing.

Just be patient. Date (slightly) older guys. Or bully, cry, threaten and manipulate your commitment-phobic love interest into diving in before he’s ready. Drag his 30-and-still-wearing-cubic zirconium-ass to the altar if you have to. Just don’t talk yourself into settling for someone that you don’t really want.

-Mattballin

This is the first in our male perspective series, make sure to comment and let him know what you think :)

-3thw

This was..

2012-01-12T17:31:00.003-08:00

The best Birthday card.
EVER.

Thanks, Nikki :-)

.seven types of ambiguity.

2012-01-11T22:21:00.000-08:00

“ You would love the way he sees you. He uses you as a weapon against himself and not merely because you did. He sits in his car at traffic lights on his way out sometimes and tries to estimate how many times he has sat here, waiting at these traffic lights on his way somewhere without you, hoping to meet someone with the capacity to consign you to an anecdote, to be eventually confused with others. He thinks of you when the woman lying next to him thinks he’s asleep.”

“Listen- all that she was then, all that she is now, those gestures, everything I remember but won't or can't articulate anymore, the perfect words that are somehow made imperfect when used to describe her and all that should remain unsaid about her- it is all unsupported by reason. I know that. But that enigmatic calm that attaches itself to people in the presence of reason- it's something from which I haven't been able to take comfort, not reliably, not since her.”

-Elliot Perlman

These excerpts speak to me.

.small talk.

2012-01-09T21:58:00.000-08:00

Dear Small Talk,

I hate you. You make me uncomfortable and I do not understand why you exist. I have never understood why perfect strangers use you to instantly make themselves imperfect in my eyes. I think most people who use you as a tool are either:

a: Not genuine.
b: Socially awkward but have read lots of self-help books.
c: Salesmen
d: All of the above

I get it, people say silence is awkward. Nobody likes to feel awkward. But is it really more awkward than you? I think maybe you are the King of Awkward. You know what's the worst? Ending you. How do you step across a puddle of politeness? How do you flee the storm of small talk?

You know what I think? I think silence is beautiful. I think silence among people speaks to a sense of personal security and confidence that most people don't have. I think we should strive to be more comfortable with silence instead of filling the space with nonsense. I don't know where it became socially unacceptable to be silent around strangers or 3rd degree acquaintances but I think it's time we start doing things differently.

Small talk, I am hereby protesting against you. I vow to refuse to participate in you even it means hanging up on people in person by abruptly walking away. I know it sounds extreme...but change doesn't come easily.

Sincerely,

Elle

Chairperson for The Society Against Small Talk (SAST)

Question...

2012-01-02T16:41:00.001-08:00

If you're able to fart around him, doesn't that kinda make you his girlfriend?

.seriously.

2011-12-30T00:46:00.000-08:00

And the day has come, that someone has decided to capitalize on the loneliness of women everywhere.

It's called the Boyfriend Pillow. I mean...

.2012.

2011-12-29T22:27:00.000-08:00

So many things will happen to you, so many things will be said to discourage you but don't forget who you are.

Don't lose sight of your dreams or let your vision be convoluted by others' expectations.

Don't forget that others' perceptions of you do not qualify as dogma.

Be the spine of steel and the feathered hands.

Be your own pyramid.

Be the version of yourself that exists when the noise fades.

Don't forget who your heart beats for.

You are beautiful.

Love, Elle

.two for flinching.

2011-12-27T23:09:00.000-08:00

When I was little, I didn't have too many favorite movies. I read a lot but I wish I would have watched more movies because then I might understand everyone else's obsession with Goonies, Adventures in Babysitting and all the other cult classics that I am not familiar with. (I also think that reading so much may have negatively impacted my eyesight but that's just a theory and although I hate to admit it most of my theories make sense to me but are completely baseless).

Anyway, there is one movie that I remember so clearly and became so attached to that I know that they must be a reflection of something important for me.

Stand by Me was the first movie that made me laugh, cry, and fall in love with watching a story about friendship unfold.

"Vern didn't just mean being off limits inside the junkyard, or fudging on our folks, or going on a hike up the railroad to Harlow. He meant those things, but it seems to me now it was more and that we all knew it. Everything was there and around us. We knew exactly who we were and exactly where we were going. It was grand."

Do you remember this movie? What was your favorite part?

la bamba forever!!

2011-12-23T16:18:00.000-08:00

.jeezy.

2011-12-20T10:57:00.000-08:00

For all of you that don't know, Rayray is obsessed with Young Jeezy and Rick Ross. So much so that when we were roadtripping to the Grand Canyon, we couldn't use Ray's ipod because it only had Jeezy, RR and a little bit of Beyonce on it, making our rental car sound kind of like a strip club.

Anyway, this is for Ray and anyone else who loves him as much as she does: